Michael Steven Wilson

Memory builds a little pathway
That goes winding through my heart.
It's a lovely, quiet, gentle trail
From other things apart;
For this road I call remembrance
Is hidden from the rest;
But I hope I'll always find you
In my memory rendezvous
For I keep this little secret place
To meet with angels like you.

went to the doctors today michael i couldnt wait till monday i dont like going to see the  emergency doctors but i feel so bad i had no choice phoned them at 7 this morning,she said i got a really bad chest so she gave me antibiotics and prednisolone to help plus she has faxed my doctor let them no whats going on so if im no better they will send me to hospital to stay in which is some thing i really dony want to do! i drank a bottle of cough medicine in less than 24hours to try and help but it hasnt lol,where im coughing so much its giving me a headache i cant seem to win right now lol,i hope to get some sleep tonight im hanging where im not sleeping as well, i think i needs to be put down pmsl!

im in bed now so will try to go sleep soon,

nite nite son

love you see you

in the morning

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Had really bad day at work , there talking to me like I’m a little kid just wanted to cry , I don’t even want to go back tomorrow  but I got to as the money is for Christmas , if there was any other way of sorting Christmas out I wouldn’t go back ,

I knew it would be hard going back in to it after having 7 months off but didn’t think I would get spoke to like a kid and treated shit I understand things has changed since I been away but that’s not a reason to be treated the way I am.

I’m feeling so tired and I’m only doing part time meant to be going back full time after Christmas but not sure about that not with how I’m feeling right now, don’t know if I will reach the end of this month yet hahaha,Oh well this is my life and I have to put up with it,

So I been told you only get what you can cope with in life well I got news for whoever decide that I can’t cope with any more!

also because karen has a bad toe i told her to have a bath rather than a shower to help it,well i ended up washing her hair and remined me of you because i done it for you all the time i just wanted to cry

Going bed soon babe to get this day over with soon as possible!

Nite nite son

Love you see you

In the morning

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why is it michael that people got to take the piss out of victoria, she been having shit in school which i hope now been sorted apart from 1 girl just wont stop. Now were away she getting some body ringing her saying there going to kill her and she going to be with you. They know how much it hurts her when people talk about you like that she hits the bloody roof and theres nothing i can do or say to stop it. I'v tried telling her dont let people see it upsets her but she cant stop her self. Please sort out what you can for her . It cant carry on like this its not fair on her at all. While im going to try and get to sleep im so tired not slept right for days where my leg been hurting and under my arm. Nite nite son love you see you in the morning xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Well Hunni, your mums treatment is over and done with. I just wanted to tell you how very proud I am of her. She stuck it out to the end even though she was ready for giving up just a few weeks into her treatment. She deserves a medal for all she has been through the last few years. Even though she has had a lot on her plate she has always been there supporting your Dad and sisters when they have needed it and even me at times. She has put up with the constant pain and tiredness and soldiered on with her everyday life. I know you have been there on her shoulder watching over her. I do hope you can send some good luck her way hunni, cos if anyone deserves it she does. Take care hunni, till we meet again one day Kim xxxx

 

Autumn leaves

Bright and vibrant

Warm sun and bright blue sky

Chilly breezes blow

Golden Leaves from Heaven fall

To ride the wind and swirl around

Red, Orange, Yellow, Green and Brown

Colors of Beauty slowly come down

A symphony of Autumns Gifts sing

From God with  Love to You and Me.

i cant belive how pissed off i am with my life right now nothing is going right all i want is some thing to go right give me some luck, i feel that my body is breaking down because every thing is hurting dont seem to matter what tablets i take its not helping, my life is just a mess why cant it get better ? i know there is people out there worse than me its just seem that every thing is happening at once here!

if you can send any luck our way that would be good!

love you michael always theres not a day that goes by i dont miss you

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cant belive karen is going to be 21 on saturday time has gone so fast michael,

karen wanted a party but i kept saying no because of not having the money with me out of work money is very very tight we are only just paying the bills ,but karen is having a party now but she is paying for it for now and i wil pay her back when i can,thats not going to be for a while with how the money is right now,i cant belive how tight it is right now,we got people ringing up asking when were going to pay this that and the other all we can say is we cant pay,its really getting me down i think thats why im not sleeping i dont normaly worry about it but its got so bad now i got no choice to worry!some times i worry where the next meal is coming from let a lone paying the bills i wish are lives could get a bit easier!oh well!

wish you were here michael theres not a dad that goes by i dont miss you and wish you were back with us!

i got doctor on friday to get some pills to help me sleep plus kelly got hospital because she getting pain in her back im hoping they will give her a m.r.i have to wait and see,i will let you know how we both get on!

love you so much michael i always will xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

What can I say Michael yet another birthday without you and it will be like that till we meet again, it don’t matter how many birthday,xmas angel days goes by its is still not easy have told you over the years how me and your dad feels without you it don’t get any better we have leant to deal with it now and that is all we can do for the rest of our life’s same as the girls, yes life has gone on we all know that it all ways will but it is never without saying we wish Michael was here with us,

We love you Michael always will

Happy 23th birthday

Mum and dad till we meet again

been out to see dad this evening he is looking ok which which is great better than he was looking last nite,

looks like dad had a angina attack plus they gave him a angeogram which found 1 of his artery was narrow so they have put another stent in now he has 3 in all together 2 on the left side and 1 on the right,he will have to start looking after his self now,he said he not going to give up smoking which i cant blame him because i havent.

just look out for him please michael i know what he wants really!

love you son always till we meet again

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i found some thing out tonight which im not happy with but it will be sorted tomorrow,how can some one say they love you and promise on your grave they wont do some thing but soon as they got the chance they do it,they dont care do they well i dont care any more there out my lofe for good there own faught they brought it on there self,iv done it before kicked people out my life so it not going to make it any harder,only thing is hard is they swore on your grave well thats what hurting me,they dont love you never did,well i will love you till were together again fuck the rest of them michael!

love you son always and for ever xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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Dear Angel...





Dear Angel,
To those who pass by you
without so much as a glance
and drum up their blessings
to good luck or chance...



open their eyes
this very day,
about the many gifts
from heaven
that come their way.

Renew their faith
in God above,
and shower them
with heavenly love.

hi michael,feeling really depressed the last few days i get up and im fine but as the day goes on i go down hill, i dont like feeling like this which is useless i cant seem to do any thing where i tired so fast or im acheing like hell,i got loads of other stuff on my mind as well i really dont know what to do any more!

i also found out today the next 5 years i got a higher chance of getting cancer again which i didnt no that also pissed me right off,as iv said i would never have chemo again where its so bad now if i get it in the next 5 years how can i tell the girls i would rather die than go though that again.

i was think more like 10 or 20 years not bloody 5 years!just have to wait and see what the next few years brings!

love you michael will all my heart always xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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hi michael,just letting you know i had my 3rd lot of chemo today it went well which is good,only thing is that its kicked in fasted then it had before soi might not be on your site for a few days like last time,i hope i will but last time it knocked me out for 4 days ,the nurse said it gets worse every time so not got a clue how bad im going to be this time,so glad im half wat though now only 3 more lots to go.be close to be michael and watch over dad and the girls i do worry about them when im like this they worry about me when im like this.

if you can help us in the other thing that i have spoken to you about would be great!

love you so much michael always will xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Heya hunni, I been and spent a few hours with your Mum today hunni. She aint too good. Watch over her Michael for all of us. She will get through this cos shes a fighter. But she is finding it hard. She is feeling useless at the moment.... which is silly to you and I but to her it is real. She is an amazing Mum, wife and especially friend. She needs some healing sent her way hun, do u think u and your angel friends could help please? I hate to see her so low and I know she hates it too. But its all part of the process I suppose... feelin like s*** before she feels better. Just wish I could be there for her more. If only we lived closer.... anyway hunni I promise you I will be there for her whenever she calls. Visit her in her dreams and let her know just how much she is loved.

Goodnight sweet prince xxxx

tell you about sunday, we all got up ok which makes a change for us lol,

we set off on time aswell had good ride down good day really kelly won gold which was great as always seeing her win,

we left devon about half 5 to start to come home,we been going about half hour and the car cut out good job we were by services so we could pull in,well there was steam coming out the car so i knew it wasnt good,dad left the car to cool down for a bit so he could see what was the matter but looked like we cooked the car which is not the best when yo need a car,but we ended up calling the R.A.C  dad told them we would need to be towed but what did they do just send a van how silly is that there is 6 of us in the car , any way we got a tow truck came picked us up we didnt get home till gone 11 when we should of been home by half 7,now we havent got a car because it will cost about 500 to get it fixed which we aint got right now we was thinking about selling it to get some money but thats right out now!

we do have a car coming as we using karen's disabilty money to get one.

the worse thing i could of ever done is when we had the money not to pay off the house and just wasted the money,now im going to pay for that for the rest of life!

dont seem to matter what i do my life will never to good,apart from dad & the girls in my life which is great,my life stopped being great when you died 5 years ago!

why cant me,dad & the girls have some thing good happen in our lifes why has it always got to be bad?

love you michael with all my heart till we meet again

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~Thinking of you Always~

4-ever loved & missed

A Mother's Prayer

Lord, today is Mother's Day, but my heart is split in two.

Half is with the child still here,

The other with the child that is now there with you.

All the lovely presents are a nice surprise,

But the one thing I want most is missing,

And tears fill my eyes.

I know when you sent him, Lord,

You didn't promise how long he would stay.

All you said was to love him and treasure each and every day.

But Lord, it crushed my heart when you called for his return.

I feel like half a Mom, as I ache, weep and yearn.

But Lord, tell him I love him just as much as I did before.

And could you please make a window,

so he can see through heaven's door ?

Let him see that he is missed and thought of with each breath.

And that a Mother's love begins before life, and does not end with death.

So, on this Mother's Day, the Greatest Gift, I give to you.

For Lord, I know you missed him and you loved him, too.

                                        -Author Unknown-

       Happy Mother's day Michelle

                 

 The Day You Went Away

Today brings tears and memories
of sorrow and regret
a day filled with such sadness
its not easy to forget

For everyone whose
lives you touched
has always loved you so
and it was hard to accept
that you''d ever have to go
and so this message is for you
especialy to say
this world lost someone wonderful
the day you went away

In Memory Of A Special

Brother

Today is full of memories

Of a Brother laid to rest

And every single one of them

Is filled with happiness

For you were someone special

Always such a joy to know

And there was so much pain

When it was time to let you go

That's why this special message

Is sent to heaven above

For the angels to take care of you

And give you all our love

All Our Love

Karen,Kelly,Victoria & Gem

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In Memory Of A Special

Son

It's sometimes hard to know

Why some things happen as they do

For so much joy and happiness

Was centered around you

It seems so hard to comprehend

That you're no longer here

But all the happy memories

Will help to keep you near

You're thought about with pride,Son

With each mention of your name

Death cannot change a single thing

The love will still remain

All our love

Mum & Dad

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michael all iv done all day is think of you,what we were doing 5 years ago today,which  you wasnt feeling well ended going to hospital,if we knew now what we knew then we would of never left you on your last night with us that i will always regret , i would of also got your sisters in sooner so you could of seem them and they could of seen you alive for the last time,i still blame my self for not saving you , you have come back to tell  me that i  could not  have saved you but my job as a mother  is to look after her kids no matter what and i failed you,im sorry!

we will see you tomorrow michael i love you with all my heart always

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Michael

They say wings are a gift, coming from heaven above
Handed down by God and given out of love
They say wings are a gift, given to God’s precious few
To those who are selfless, caring and true

The angel of April is the spirit of rebirth.

As the days grow longer and the sun begins to warm us, April is a time for new life and new beginnings.  April's angel spurs us to test ourselves in new directions and to make ourselves vulnerable in the face of unfamiliar people, situations and places.  Encouraged by the April angel, we search for new and novel endeavors that will enrich our lives and bring new meaning to our career or family roles.

The April angel teaches us to delight in each sign of awakening, in nature and within ourselves.

               In Loving Memory

                    of an Angel

                  Michael Wilson

                                                           

 

               

Hi Michael, just letting you know what went on today at the hospital, doctor done a scan and found loads of fluid inside my boob so they got rid of that they’re going to send it away see if there is any infection in there which could be why I’m not healing, worse thing about all this is my chemo been put off

now for 2weeks so it should start on the 28^th April, I’m really not happy about

it I got myself all really for if and now I got wait I really hate not being in control of my life got to go back this Thursday just to get check and get the results,

Love you Michael always till we meet again xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hi Michael,

Thought I would come and have a chat, right now I’m feeling like shit under my arm is still sore I’m going doctor tomorrow see what she says as the cream the other doctor gave me don’t seem to have worked, well been doctor she not happy with how my boob looks because it’s all red and hot so she rang the hospital up while I was there and I’m going there Monday just in case I got a infection which if I have that will put my chemo off which is not what I wanted to hear!

Next Tuesday I’m having my hair shaved off raise money for renal unit and the breast charity hope we can raise at least 500 quid that would be nice have to wait and see got loads of forms out there with people hope they get some money,

Dad is drying his hair pink lol, he will have it shaved off on Tuesday so it won’t be pink for long, Kelly not happy about it the rest of us thinks it’s funny lol.

I’m feeling really down with how I’m feeling plus I don’t know how we’re going to cope with no money things are really hard all ready and that just after 2weeks what we going to be like in a few months it makes me feel bad that I’m ill and got to have time off which is getting us in this shit, so wish I could help some other way don’t know what to do anymore!

Also it’s that time of year again aint it nearly 5 years since you been gone it only seems like yesterday I will never get over losing you believe its a case of you learn to cope better even though I’m crying inside and all ways will till were all together again!

Love you so much Michael xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

         

 

    

Let not your heart be troubled
Let not your soul be sad
Easter is a time of joy
When all hearts should be glad
Glad to know that Jesus Christ
Made it possible for men
To have their sins forgiven
And, like Him, to love again
So at this joyous season
May the wondrous Easter Story
Renew our faith so we may be
Partakers of His glory

 

In My Prayers

michael feeling really low tonight,there is so much going on in our lifes right now me with my cancer and starting chemo in a few weeks there dad not feeling very well which makes me worry about him,there the bills to owrry about how were going to pay them with me off work,and now me and your dad is going to have our hair shaved off because of the cancer,i cant belive were having more shit in our life,how much more have me dad and your sisters got to put up with,havent we all ready been though enough? i dont understand life ,it was bad enough loseing you and now with this i will never understand, i said on new years eve this would be a better year for us well how bloody wrong i was.
if you no any answers to this please come and tell me or now were going to pay the bills ,

i will fight this i got your dad and your sisters to worry about so its not going to beat me at all,
all i need from you is to look after dad and your sister,s please!
love you always till we meet again
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You are the "Pot of Gold" at the end of my Rainbow....

                      

                            

 

There’s a magical place known as Heaven Where everything’s lovely and green, And castles and cottages cover the hills... With a beauty like you've never seen. There are Blessings and Smiles to greet you, wherever you happen to roam. And as much "Luck & Joy" as the shamrocks  that grow~ In this land that the "Angels" call HOME!!!  Have a Beautiful and Magical St Patrick's Day....

Hi Michael, Feeling really sore and uncomfortable right now had a bandage on yesterday but took it off this morning, my boob don’t look that bad apart from the bruising its black & blues and swollen so can’t really see how much is gone they had to take all my lymph nodes away as 1 that they took to get tested when I was under came back with cancer, so they then take them all away as that what takes the cancer round your body got to go back next week for all the results they used to take a few days but where they so busy now they prefer you go back in a week’s time, that’s when I will find out what treatment I will be having I think so going to be chemo and radiotherapy I have told dad and the girls that if I have to have chemo there is a good chance I will lose my hair, but before I do I’m going to do a sponsor head shave I’m not losing my hair for nothing I’m going to raise money for the children hospital ward 37,your ward which will go with the money we all ready got, dad said he will do it as well so I don’t feel lonely lol feel it the right thing to do, not sure everybody else will think that but I don’t care, Just need you to look after dad and the girls, it’s going to be hard if I got to have chemo because I’m likely to have 6 months off work which aint great for paying the bills, really don’t know how we’re going to cope with that, Love you Michael always xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I have added an Angel Friends page to Melissa's site and would love for you to put your angel Michael on her page.

hi michael, for got to tell you that kelly is going away tomorrow till tuesday with judo there going to france for judo weekend,she going to love it long as her back and neck is ok,watch over her for us son,i dont like she going there without us but we cant afford to go with her,wish dad could of gone but cant do that either,oh well that life for us aint it,like i said can you watch over her please!

off to bed now im so tired this week has reallt taken it out of me,

love you always michael xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

hi michael,

well you know i went to the doctor last week,she sent me to the hospital for test which i went for yesterday,i had loads of test yesterday had scan mammogram then a biopsy,had to wait till the results came back which they did and yes it's breast cancer,i got to have it removed in 2weeks time,iv caught it really early so its all good,

i will have to have loads of time off work,which is not great now the hell is the bills going to be paid? this is where i really need your help , i really dont know how we going to get through this i will be as strong as i can,its just the bills is going to be hard to sort,and as for dad and the girls im so worried about them,it really hurts knowing i cant help them,i will answer any thing they asks if i can!

please please please watch over dad and the girls!

love you so much always will

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